Easter Sunday, yesterday, brought another round of cleansing and another step in my journey. I let go of more toxicity in my life. While I had held on for about a year to those who used to be a part of my circle of friends and family, I let go of some of them yesterday as I purged them from my Facebook account. Some may think it is mean, malicious and vindictive. However, for me, it is a cleansing. These people are not good for my life right now. I chose to void this one connection amongst us. Though they are making choices that are not in the best interest of the kids right now, I continue to choose to keep that door open. Whenever the kids want to contact any of these toxic individuals, I allow them to do so. I, however, choose to keep my distance so I may keep my health and recovery.
They are still too entrenched in the denial and enabling. I understand that they do not see it. Or, if they do, they may feel helpless and unable to escape. I've been there...I understand! They, however, do not. From what I get from them, they feel I am to blame, that I am being mean and vindictive, that I do not see the recovery of Rob. What they do not see is that the veil of denial is no longer clouding my judgment as it clouds theirs. I do not hate them for this. Again, I understand. I have decided not to invite that toxicity into my life any longer.
They have my phone number. They have my email address. If they need or want to contact me, they know how to accomplish that. I have found that as I cleanse my life of the toxicity that is still present, I become more and more healthy, emotionally, mentally and physically. I have decided today to take a step in the physical health realm. It is the one area where I have not focused during the first year of my recovery. I must begin now so I can take advantage of the wonderful opportunities and positivity that are in my life right now.
This IS the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in Him.
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